


maybe in another world

by orphan_account



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Heavy Angst, M/M, Short One Shot, Wishful Thinking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-06
Updated: 2020-04-06
Packaged: 2021-03-02 01:53:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 387
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23517217
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Jeremy was always stupid, especially when it came to how he felt about Richard Goranski.
Relationships: Rich Goranski/Jeremy Heere
Kudos: 19





	maybe in another world

**Author's Note:**

> Just something short I wrote at 4am.

Jeremy is not an idiot. Although his recent actions beg to prove him otherwise, he finds solace in the confirmation of this as he banishes the SQ.U.I.P. He still remembers its screams of agony, like some sort of Disney villain falling to their death. That isn't what concerns him, now: other than the crippling guilt these past events have injected into him, he also has to deal with Richard Goranski.

Rich never speaks. He is but a shell of his former self--but wasn't that the case, even when Rich still had his S.Q.U.I.P.? Jeremy itches to converse with him about this, to reach a level of understanding about each other that no one else could, but Rich is always silent, unmoving. Jeremy tries to pretend this does not bother him. It works, somehow.

"Hey, Rich," Jeremy says. They are alone at the moment, both confined to their respective hospital beds. "Do you ever dream about them sometimes?"

Jeremy does. The presence of it lingers, a horrible odor that can never truly be erased, only removed momentarily. Jeremy shudders at the thought.

He focuses instead on the boy beside him, his eyes dark, not looking at anything in particular. He sees the way his chest is completely still, the way his facial features allow handsomeness to prevail, and Jeremy sighs, softly.

He wishes things would have been different.

He wishes he had known Richard Goranski back in freshman year, back when he was his truest, dorkiest self, back when Jeremy was certain he would find all the ways to love him that Rich himself had never realized.

Jeremy almost reaches out to touch him. He remembers the harshness of their S.Q.U.I.P.s, how they had combined into one being existing only to torment them both and all who crossed it. He feels something surge within him, and in spite of himself, his hands move forward, grazing Rich's skin with his fingertips--

It is then that he remembers.

He actually is an idiot. _He actually is an idiot._ He cements this truth deep in his mind, closes his eyes, and swallows.

Richard Goranski is dead. What existed on the bed beside his was the manifestation of his regrets, and when he opened his eyes, it was gone.


End file.
